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Crossroad Women and Family Services, Inc.

Post Office Box 2421, Kingston, NY 12402

Crossroad Women and Family Services, Inc.

"Transforming the Lives of Women Who Transform their World"

Healing Beyond Childhood Trauma

Did you know that most people in the US have at least one ACE? ACE's are adverse childhood experiences that not only causes harm to the brain of children it changes they way they respond to the stresses of life, compromises their immune systems and causes other chronic health conditions over their lifetime. According to a CDC Kaiser Permanente ACE Study childhood trauma and ACE places people at risk for depression, chronic diseases, mental illness, financial problems, social problems and becoming a victim of violence and sexual crimes.

Other ACE surveys have expanded the types of ACE's and those findings while not surprising are also noted below. Below are traumatic experiences linked to social, financial, mental, emotional and physical problems. 

1. A family member who is diagnosed with a mental illness or depressed.

2. Witnessing a mother being abused.

3.A family member who is addicted to drugs or alcohol.

4. Physical, sexual and verbal abuse.

5. A family member who is in prison.

6. Parental separation or divorce.

7. Physical or emotional neglect.

8. Living in an unsafe neighborhood.

9. Experiencing or witnessing racism.

10. Witnessing violence outside of the home.

11. Involvement with the foster care system.

12. Losing a family member due to deportation.

13. Witnessing a father being abused by a mother.

14.Living in a war zone.

15.Being bullied by a peer or adult.

If you have one or more ACE's you are not alone. Research shows that nearly two-third of adults have at least one. Additionally, the scores are even more revealing. For example people with an ACE score of 4 are twice as likely to smoke and seven times more likely to struggle with alcoholism addiction. Additionally, a score of 4 or more is likely to increase the risk of chronic diseases such as emphysema or chronic bronchitis by 400 percent, while also increasing the risk for attempted suicide by 1200. ACE's is also linked to chronic workplace absenteeism, ER visits, mental illness, criminal justice involvement and increased healthcare costs. 

The higher the ACE score the more likely it is that people with these scores have more marriages, violence, drug prescriptions, increased risk for broken bones, greater struggles with depression and autoimmune diseases. Studies show that the life span of individuals with an ACE score 6 or higher are at risk for being shortened by 20 years.

The impact of childhood traumatic experiences doesn't just go away as people age. Rather, what a person has lived through directly or indirectly leaves bits and pieces. Harmful traces of the past that keeps showing up has the ability to be passed down from one generation to the next causing generational cycles of unhealed trauma and strongholds.

While the brain does not know the difference between one kind of traumatic experienced and toxic stress from the other we are not stuck with stressed out brains, painful memories, chronic diseases, mental illness or substance abuse. 

It's essential that people receive an effective diagnosis from an effective team of caring medical professionals who can create qualified treatment plan so the journey to healing and recovery can begin. 

Wishing you health and wellness,

Patrina M Torres, Founder, Totally Healed International 

NCCA Certified Temperament Counselor, Certified Instructor 

School of Counseling, S.A.C.C. Certified Academic Institution


Email: [email protected]


My Blog


Healing Our Hurting Athletes

Posted on July 8, 2015 at 9:21 AM
Have you ever taken the opportunity to sit down and talk with someone? Not about what they do but about who they are. Not about their wins, but what they feel they've loss and can never get back. There are many athletes who are winning on the field, but it seems that they're losing off the field. Many times we forget that athletes wasn't born playing sports. They are REAL PEOPLE. 

They hurt, they bleed and they cry. Many young men have been hurt within their families. Hurt by the father they never knew. Hurt by the father who said he was coming and never showed up. Hurt by the father who told him he'd never be anything, called him a worthless loser and made him feel like he should have never been born. Some of athletes have been hurt physically by men- who wasn't their fathers. 

Men who issued discipline but didn't want a relationship. Some witnessed violence in their home. 
They say their mother's being beaten for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Some mothers were beat early in the morning and when their children returned home from school there was always a fear that any moment rage and violence could erupt. 

IMAGINE being a child feeling hopeless and helpless because you can't be the protector everyone said you need to be since daddy left the family. IMAGINE living life on the run, not having a place to call your own, moving several times due to violence. Adjusting to new neighborhoods and schools. Trying to make new friends but not allowed to invite them to your home because of the low-income area you lived in. 

IMAGINE being a male child and wanting to protect your mother from violent but not being able to intervene because mama didn't want you to get hurt. She knew that that her man wasn't too fond of children, but she stayed with him anyway. 

IMAGINE not understanding why the family just couldn't leave and REALLY start over again. IMAGINE always hearing "No" and being angry that you had to stay. Not having enough food or basic needs met. 

While not every athlete can testify to these issues some can. Perhaps, no one has had the time to sit down and listen to their stories. And rather than exploit them seek to provide hope, help and healing.

 Would you agree that some of our athletes are hurting? How can we stop the bleeding hearts?

The pain of the past can torment a person. It can produce low self-esteem, insecurity, anger, violence, substance abuse, imprisonment, identity theft and arrested childhood development. If there is no healing it can become a way of life and pattern. While violence, poverty, broken families, absentee father, drug addiction etc.  may have been part of ones past history it doesn't have to be part of the future.

If what we're doing today has the power to negatively impact and destroy our tomorrow we must find another way. Choose to identify where we are, understand what the needs are and determine which options can best facilitate healing from the inside out, forgiveness and reconciliation within ourselves. 

The power of healing from within is that it makes us whole. It causes us to ask for forgiveness from those we may have hurt along the way and be willing to forgive those who hurt us as well.

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